At Hallmark, it's been Christmas Since October 17th

In case you were wondering, we're already Counting Down to Christmas over at the Hallmark Channel.  

Back in September we shared Hallmark's forewarnings, and the schedule, as it was then published.  What it didn't indicate was that Hallmark was dipping into its now endless stash of movies and that, as near as I can tell, they went into Christmas rotation on two of the three Hallmark channels on October 17th with the arrival of a new seasons of The Mistletoe Murders.  But, for days beforehand, they had been playing Christmas stuff, but I didn't really pay it much mind.

For those who don't check in on these things, Hallmark moves around when it goes all in on the Christmas season, and in many years refuses to stick to the internationally favored Mariah Carey Calendar, which declares 12:00 AM on November the First as when we can begin prepping for the holidays.  

This year to kick off the holidays, Hallmark rounded up a handful of favored actors and dumped them in Nashville  where they'd visit the Grand 'ol Opry and a Hallmark store where Lacey Chabert was presenting her line of officially licensed goods.

In our house we will only have the Lacey Chabert ornament, which will receive a prominent place at the front of the tree.   I would gladly purchase the Lacey Chabert Glass Ornaments, but our small tree is already very full, and I do not want to explain to Jamie why Lacey Chabert is achieving Manifest Destiny on our tree. 

At this time Hallmark is also running new episodes of one of the nichey-est possible reality competitions, Finding Mr. Christmas.   If you did not guess, FMC is a gameshow where kind-of-dim guys compete to be the next "Hallmark Hunk".  This is an extraordinary opportunity to earn a solid middle-class living as an actor.  I tried to watch an episode of the show for you, The People, and for science...  but even I can only take so much cringe before I start wondering what I'm doing with my time.  I made it 2/3rds of the way through one episode before I felt second-hand embarrassment and walked away.  Which is unfortunate, because the hosts are both charming.

Anyway, the reality is that the show is aimed at people who want to ogle well-meaning dopes who are good looking, but not so good looking that you wouldn't find them working at a car dealership.  And if that's your game, salute.  

New movies have started rolling out, including one starring Ms. Kimberley Sustad, which I've now seen and will write up soon.  Meanwhile, the blitz is on, and if you're ready for the Holidays, Hallmark is sure ready for you.

Ms. Sustad in this year's offering, Merry Christmas, Ted Cooper

If you haven't been following along, Hallmark long ago dumped its standard plotline of Business Lady Goes to Smalltown and Meet-Cutes a local Handyman/ Christmas Tree Lot Guy/ Former High School Flame.  So.  I hesitate to say what the movies are even about anymore.  But they have doubled-down on the familiar faces when it comes to Hallmark stars, which I think is probably a solid business strategy in an old-school movie-factory way.  That said, I only know who a few of them are except for "eh, she's one of the annoying ones" and moving on.

What I am far less aware of - due to my basic cable not carrying Lifetime, Up! or other channels that show Holiday movies are up to.  Not a clue.  Maybe I'll know what Netflix is doing, but I think Lindsay Lohan has moved on, and Chabert is now all sewn up with Hallmark.  

So everyone buckle up.  We've got more than a 1/6th of the year dedicated to hot cocoa, polite misunderstandings, sweaters and everyone's loved ones encouraging the lead to get railed by the guy who never moved away.