Forget Black Friday or Cyber Monday. Your Holiday season can officially begin with Krampus Day! Yes, that merry old emobdiment of terror is here for your children, just in time to remind them that being "naughty" may have grave consequences beyond making your parents buy you the XBox Santa refuses to deliver.
Tuesday evening SimonUK and I went and saw The Thing at the Ritz. We'd both been anticipating the movie for some time, Si more than I, as John Carpenter's 1982 take on The Thing is sort of, I think to him, a bit like Miller's Crossing or Blade Runner are to myself.
But I really like Carpenter's The Thing, too. I'm not much of a horror fan (I was a delicate child and prone to getting easily freaked out), but I hold The Thing and The Shining in very, very high regard for their era.
Last year Si, StevenB and I all watched a digital restoration of the original, and it was a reminder of how darn well that movie holds up, in no small part because of performances by Kurt Russell and Wilford Brimley.
The new movie is actually a prequel, and if you saw the 1980's version, you will likely remember the Norwegian Camp. Well, this is that.
According to website Frankensteinia (who I would think would know), today the movie Frankenstein turned 80 in that August 24th, 1931 marked the start of filming.
You kids today and your "Final Destinations". In my day our monsters grunted and wore sport coats, like gentlemen!
I don't know exactly when I finally watched Frankenstein. It certainly was never on TV while I was growing up (black and white movies did poorly back then, thus the horrendous Turner colorization effort circa 1991), and I recall it just wasn't really around much of VHS that I ever saw at Blockbuster or wherever else I was renting movies. Mostly I remember books around the house about monster movies, but who knows when I saw this at long last? I do know I saw the Abbot and Costello Meet Frankenstein movie first when I was at a birthday party when I was very little (it was on 8mm. Pre VHS, people).
A while back SimonUK mentioned he'd somehow already seen Attack the Block at a festival, and vouched for it, stating that when it came to Austin this summer, we really needed to go see it. Some of the producers and talent involved are from the group that brought us Hot Fuzz and Shaun of the Dead, some loving takes on familiar genres, infused with smart-alec humor and a fan's know-how enough to both play with conventions and know what's important about retaining some of those conventions. But all without getting too precious, I think.
Attack the Block does not, I repeat, does not feature Simon Pegg, but I promise you it is still a very good movie.
Wow! This is pretty amazing. The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has taken notice of Austin's own Mondo posters and is going to begin officially adding them to their archives. Very cool!
Also, Mondo announced they'll be selling this limited edition Frankenstein poster, and when they do, it will be mine. Oh yes, it will.
CHANGE OF PLANS: We are now attending the July 6th screening of both movies with Them! playing first, and then Godzilla
I haz crash ur party?
People, I am no Godzilla aficionado (and yes, they exist), but I am a fan of the Godzilla movies I have seen, including the 1954 original. I am also a fan of the 1954 entomologists' dream, Them!. Why, if you're a fan of @#$% that can go wrong with wildlife during a nuclear test, this is absolutely the double-feature you've been waiting for.
Fortunately for us Austinites, this year's Paramount schedule features a double bill of both movies on the same night, and I am going to either do both of Tuesday or one each on Tuesday and Wednesday. If you want to join us, send me an email or text me or whatever.
When The Blair Witch Project debuted back in 1999, its not like people suddenly thought "oh, @#$%! Witches are real!" But the effect of the movie on a population of people who'd grown up slinging handy cams had a pretty intense effect. Flashforward 12 years, a flopped sequel, innumerable knock-offs (Cloverfield, etc...) and a cottage industry of "reality" shows about people hunting ghosts in modestly aged homes, and.... anyway.
I'm not so much worn out on actual zombie movies and comics as I am on the "let us beat this meme into the ground until its an embarrassment" that has come along with the past five or six years in the geek-o-sphere. At the end of the day, I really liked Dawn of the Dead when I finally watched it last fall (it was also about 8x better than Snyder's remake, which people raved about, much to my confusion), I really liked TV's Walking Dead, and I only recently learned that CSPAN is not actually a network dedicated to showing the droning, rambling undead, but until that point, I'd been quite a fan.
So I was a bit skeptical of hopping onboard DC/ Vertigo's new series iZombie, despite the art being handled by Mike Allred, one of my favorite comic artists. Marvel kick started the whole zombie phenomenon with the one-note joke that was Marvel Zombies (and which was a funny good idea for, maybe, a one-shot, not 5 years worth of comics), and virtually every other publisher picked up on the fad, culminating in DC's Blackest Night series, which wasn't really zombies, but that's splitting hairs.
Still, the comics internets really seemed to LIKE iZombie, which means almost nothing on a typical day. I didn't know if this was more "oh, Zombies! He he he!" geekdom just leftover from the zombie craze, if this was one of those cases of the tastemakers seemingly randomly picking a comic or character to champion as seems to be SOP in the comics internets (ex: lets all suddenly love Thor!), or if there was something genuinely to the raves.
As I mentioned above, I really like Mike Allred's work, but I've not always been a fan of the comics he actually works on. I burnt out on X-Force pretty quickly, and I never could stick with Madman (which was weird, because it seemed like it should have been exactly in my wheelhouse). But the comic was written by Austin-local, Superman-scribe and much-buzzed-about Chris Roberson, and I figured that was at least worth a shot.
I'm happy to report that the money spent was well worth it. Yes, Allred seems to just get better, and he seems like he's having the same fun here I felt he was having on those early issues of X-Force. He and his wife, colorist Laura Allred, are hitting on all cylinders here. The body horror of the comic is toned down through the Allreds' style to keep the focus on the story, and to push the story along (one can imagine what this book would have looked like under, say, Juan Jose Ryp - who does what he does well, but it would have been a much different comic).
Of course an Allred-drawn female protagonist looks like a very pretty girl with a migraine, or perhaps working on two days without sleep. In this case its "Gwen", our protagonist/ not-shambling-mess zombie of the title.
yes, brains will be consumed
Gwen is dead, yes. But she can avoid becoming a Night of the Living Dead-style zombie by consuming a human brain every 4 weeks or so. Inbetween... she's just kind of pale and can eat whatever she pleases. No, we don't see monstered-out Gwen in this book (spoiler!).
Roberson isn't out to create a horror anthology with iZombie, and he isn't exactly playing to the same tone as, say, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but he is out to create a fun and and surpising book that manages to defy expectations in enough places that it does feel like Roberson is doing something new and different using very familiar tropes. The first volume's true climax includes the imparting of essential knowledge to push the character (and, one imagines, the supporting cast) forward and out of what's become routine for the undead of the cast.
In many ways, I'm much more interested in the world Roberson puts on the page, and exploring how that world operates than I would be in building toward some big-boss fight. If he can manage to make the concept of a zombie novel in the middle of 2011, then I've got high hopes.
Here be spoilers
I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm concerned about cliches appearing. An ancient religious order dedicated to wiping out the paranormal has become so common, its now a standard down at SyFy Network original programming. Let alone "the hunter and the hunted feel a mutual attraction" is a standard trope in any genre.
I'm not here to offer Roberson advice. The man knows what he's doing, and for all I know, he's got some off-the-wall plans for what looks like a "been there, done that" storyline.
Endeth the spoilers
The Monster Squad
In a few issues, Roberson has created a memorable cast, and its going to be the "community" feel of the book that will see this title sink or swim. From Gwen to her ghostly BFF to the hangdog "Scott" (an unfortunate were-Terrier), a clique of vampires and a mysterious, bandaged stranger... its a good little group that Roberson and Allred have put together here.
There are plenty of seeds planted for at least two years' worth of stories, and I hope Roberson gets a chance to explore them all.
The book manages to pull off an interesting balancing act of bringing to life horror monsters in an almost "day in the life" approach, and makes them likeable without resorting to getting twee or overtly cutesy, defanging the concept utterly, or transporting the concept to another genre in order to make it "relatable" (see: Monster High). In short, it never gets turned into kiddy material just because its also not a horror book.
I'll definitely be picking up the next volume, and I'll put this on the "recommended list" if the next volume can maintain the spirit and style.
I know for a fact that we have a whole bunch of Godzilla fans here at The Signal Watch. So, first things first... Tomorrow, IDW premiers a new Godzilla series which should be arriving at your local comic book store. Its called Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters, and you should accept no substitute.
RAAAARRGGGHHHH!!!!!
So, go to your local shop and pick it up! If your local shop joined in the promo, they may have a cover featuring Godzilla stomping down on the roof of your shop. Here in Austin, I know that we've got Godzilla stomping down on my shop, Austin Books and Comics, and artist Matt Frank will be in store to sign copies.
And the hairdresser next door went unscathed
The local CBS affiliate did a neat story on the release of the issue, inviting the artist in and ABC's own Brandon Z (who is a bit of a Godzilla aficionado). Watch the story here.
I have seen some of the Godzilla-related merchandise Brandon has added to the store, and, man, it is going to be a good day to be a Godzilla fan in Austin.
Godzilla heads cross-country to get to his LCS to buy the comic with him in it
I may hate disasters in real life, but I love me some Godzilla in, uh... well, what I really hope is a parallel universe where Monster Island really exists.
the 1944 noirish classic Laura featuring Dana Andrews and the lovely Gene Tierney
Gojira, the original Japanese version of Godzilla (1954) from before someone decided to cut in Raymond Burr to Americanize the flick
Predator, the 1987 action/ alien monster flick starring two actual Governors of actual States of the US and the now-under-utilized Carl Weathers
Of late, I've felt like there's so much perfectly good stuff out there that I haven't seen yet, or that I have seen but felt it needed another watching more than, say, Gnomeo + Juliet, that I haven't been out to see very many new movies the past year. Not to say I don't go out to the movies. Of course, Austin likes to cater to dorks my age with $10 burning a hole in their pocket, and so if you want to see a super-rare 35mm print of Predator, this is the town to do it in. And just as TPR runs a terrific summer cinema series of classic and unusual film, so, too, will Austin's Paramount theater.
Sure, I feel bad I didn't see The King's Speech (not really, but I know it will make you feel better if I say so), but in my experience, if a movie is worth watching, it will be worth watching at some indeterminate point in the future, perhaps more so than had I watched it as part of a media blitz and award season rampage.
That said, I wish the only true arthouse theater left in Austin were not a hike from my house. And that they also served delicious red pepper hummus like The Alamo. As it is far from my home and the best I can do is popcorn or Whoppers (which: gross), I don't even really look to see what's playing at the Arbor anymore.
This was my second viewing of Laura, and I realized I actually had forgotten "whodunnit" when it came to the murder, so it was actually quite a bit of fun to watch again and see a young Vincent Price playing The Handsome but Weak Young Man. And, of course, the mid-movie twist is more or less now a cinema classic (it was fun to watch Jamie during that part).
Add a mustache, smoking jacket, and a razor sharp pendulum of death, and there's Mr. Price!
Its almost more of a drawing room mystery than a true noir, but the obsession with the murdered Laura and the various motives of our suspects certainly makes it a candidate for the ill-defined genre. I like to think its a precursor to Vertigo, which is a much more complicated film and takes the obsession just that little bit crazier (thanks, Jimmy Stewart!), but its hard to argue with success or Dana Andrews' as the no-BS-cop who falls hard for a dame who is pushing up daisies.
If you've only seen the American cut of the original Godzilla (which is a perfectly good movie, by the way), I really recommend checking out the original Japanese version, Gojira. This is the first Godzilla flick, and its where the groundwork for Godzilla as big, physical manifestation of the psychic sins of humanity gets outlined, and in this version its pretty powerful stuff. Especially when one considers this was about 9 years after Hiroshima, etc...
Gojira just cannot figure out where he dropped his keys
There's just so much to love in a Godzilla movie, whether you're watching it as an earnest albeit metaphorical cautionary tale, as high camp of Man in Suit or just to bask in the weirdness of the sequels. Being the first, Gojira doesn't hint at the wink-and-a-nod-ness of the more self-aware Godzilla movies, and before technology had moved beyond Man in Suit (but it has become a point of pride to keep the Godzilla movies pure with puppetry and miniatures).
In about a week, a new Godzilla comic hits, and that was really part of why I was reviewing the movie. Also, man, Godzilla is awesome, but...
And, last but not least, SimonUK and I made it out to the Alamo to see Predator. Its funny how you learn new things all the time, such as: Director/ Writer Shane Black is actually IN this movie as Hawkins.
These guys really know how to wipe out defenseless trees
Predator is definitely a nostalgia trip for me as its representative of the movies I was watching once we had a VCR, a membership at the local video store and evenings to kill during the summer. The unapologetically explosive flicks of the 1980's made up my movie viewing in those years between kid's shows and figuring out movies could be a nuanced form of storytelling, which i think started when my Uncle showed me Das Boot and Godfather in the same weekend when I was 15. But I still like these movies.
Predator also represents one of the high points of a specific sort of genre that became relegated to direct-to-video when studios just quit trying. In many ways, Predator is sort of a high point for a genre that came out of 50's B-movies and has since become a staple of SyFy original movies. And in that, much like John Carpenter's The Thing, I was surprised to see that Predator is actually a pretty darn good movie.
You don't see much of him since he went off to run Howard University's RTF department, but actor/ director Bill Duke makes a serious impression as the "going quickly crazy" Mac. And I find it surprising you didn't see more of the Elpidia Carillo after this movie.
But the movie is also notable for other names associated with the picture. Famous creature maker Stan Winston designed the Predator, Die Hard director John McTeirnan did this pic first, Joel Silver was a producer, Alan Silvestri wrote the score...
...and Arnie appeared as the kid who gets bullied
I like the "technology vs. primitive" aspects, especially as the humans realize they don't have any technological advantage (a bit like people versus, say, deer) and the technology the humans depends on becomes useless compared to mud and sticks. I also think you have to admire how the movie conveys the odd, wordless expression of the Predator honor system that becomes a thread in the movie. Sure, its got some hokey lines, irresponsible use of explosives and firearms, and seems to believe Native Americans are magical, but its still a fun flick in a sort of Jack London-ish way. Only with exploding heads, chain guns, and laser missiles.
I already had plans to read this series and am quietly very excited about getting a copy of this comic. I find the idea of Godzilla rampaging his way down Lamar toward The Triangle, and into campus, then southward toward the Capitol... appealing.
when will the staff of ABC learn to live in balance with nature?
And I think Brandon at ABC would have wanted to go exactly this way, by the way.
I know there's been just a ton of stuff coming through the past week in honor of Halloween. Here's a quick round-up of links for your clicking pleasure!
I am afraid this review was overlooked as it posted at the same time as several other items. Since the initial posting, writer and editor Ryan Colucci has shown up in the comment section to describe the production process. Its a great addendum to the post.
rrrrrrrggghhhhhrrr!!!!
Jason wanted to know if he "won" the "contest" with his Halloween submission. While this wasn't a contest, I think he's going to feel a lot better if we all just smile and nod and tell him he won, so play along, won't you?
If you have some time to kill, here's an index of all entries (and, man, we got a great turn out!) for the Halloween Monster Mash.
I can't tell you guys how much I appreciate the participation. Its made coming back to writing a whole lot of fun. After all, the best part for me is always seeing what other people have to say. When it comes to something like "monsters", seeing your thoughts on the topic is infinitely more fun than just cranking out another post about why Superman is awesome.
Have a great Halloween!
treat yourself to some spooky stuff this Halloween!
The Admiral was visiting and mentioned the Halloween interactivity. He doesn't usually participate in our shenanigans, but he did bring up his favorite monster. In his words: You know, when you're twelve, that seems like just about the best monster possible.
At any rate, I'd say the apple doesn't fall that far from the tree.
How does the traffic guy on the news explain this situation?
I thought I'd participate at the beginning with Part 1, and then come back here at the end for Part 2.
This has been remarkably difficult. 1) Some things I considered I had to get a gut-check from Jamie as to whether it actually qualified as a monster. 2) Naming your favorite monster can be like naming your favorite child. 3) I didn't really want to just name the same monsters that everyone else had named (when it comes to monsters, it is still true that variety is the spice of life).
Here's on to Part Deux:
3) The Mummy - Least Favorite
I admit this with some disappointment. I'd like to say that Karloff's performance in 1932's The Mummy was even the issue. Or that it was the "re-imagining" of The Mummy from 1999 was at fault.
this is not a Peter Murphy album cover
Nah. Mostly, its that the iconic 1932 movie is about 90 minutes. In the first 9 minutes its archaeologists yapping at each other, then about 1.5 minutes of really great, really scary stuff, and then about 78 minutes of people yapping again and not much happening (and Karloff in a fez). There are a lot of things I'll forgive in a genre movie, but... man, when you reanimate a mummy, you kind of raise the stakes for your movie. You cannot drop the ball once you've put the undead in motion.
Here's The Mummy springing to life and one of my favorite scenes in classic horror. You can probably skip to the 2:00 mark.
Unfortunately, the rest of the movie doesn't even begin to try for this level of creepiness.
I suspect I'm the only one who has seen this movie, so: basically, after reanimating, The Mummy, Imhotep, scares the bejeezus out of a dude, then disappears for a decade only to resurface as a normal Egyptian guy that looks remarkably like Boris Karloff. Imhotep doesn't tear up Cairo. Instead, he's just sort of being pervy around a perfectly sweet girl.
"Baby, this is totally a monster movie. I think."
But the Mummy part? With the bandages, et al.? Pretty short time frame in the movie. There's just not much in the way of straight-up monstering in this flick. Sure, Karloff gets to act a bit and deliver lines, and, frankly, the story itself is fairly creative in its abuse of Egyptian culture, lore and history, and set all kinds of precedents for genre media, right up to and including 2000's-era DC Comics, but... the original movie and its monster are just sort of odd in the cold light of day.
There's just never much happening.
I'm Imhotep. I'll be your monster tonight...
That said, I still love the iconography of the movie, and I want to like horror movie mummies, but there's a reason I think they just don't pop up all that often in modern horror movies. "Slow moving guy in bandages" just doesn't read well as a good villain. Nor does "middle aged guy in a fez" read as terribly menacing. The 1999 remake featured some enhancements, making The Mummy a sort of evil wizard with all sorts of kooky magical powers and a limitless army of beetles at his command. Also: Rachel Weisz. But it also led to two bad sequels and somebody greenlighting Van Helsing.
Truly, it seems the Mummy does carry a curse.
Of the Universal Monsters, I have to rate The Mummy as sub-par. But I love that scene, and I can always hope for a new, interesting Mummy flick.
4) Ghosts/ Haunted Houses (like in 1963's The Haunting or The Shining) - favorite
I was never terrified of monsters under my bed. I did go through a brief period in second grade where I was convinced there was a headless guy with a bloody axe standing at the foot of my bed, but if I didn't come out from under the covers, he didn't know I was there.
To the point, I was mostly scared of sounds and bumps in the night that I didn't think should be there. This included this one time in 3rd grade when I was quietly playing with Star Wars figures in my room and suddenly a Batmobile rolled off the shelf and onto the floor. I still remember sprinting down the stairs.
It's not just that ghosts are things around you that you think are sharing space and you have no control over them, but that ghosts are supposedly perpetually unhappy dead people. And they are in the room with you.
I want to be clear: I'm what TAPS would call a "skeptic". Or what I would call "noises in the dark are just noises". Call me a concrete thinker, whatever.
But there's also a fight or flight mechanism built in, and its hard to ignore a billion years of evolution that tells you that when air pressure, smells or sounds suddenly change, something may be up. Folks may have once blamed things they couldn't sort out of goblins, leprechauns, and whatnot... and while a huge portion of the world no longer believes that, say, goblins run around your house when you aren't looking, we're still watching Ghost Hunters in 2010.
I get it. When Jamie and I got married we stayed at Austin's Driskill Hotel, a building rumored to have a few ghosts, I went wandering the hallway in the wee hours to go get ice. Its not too hard to see how sound traveled in that place in some deeply eerie ways (I could hear a party somewhere, as if on the floor, but I could never figure out where it was), and how people get some funky ideas, especially when they are alone.
The TV shows and movies (and almost every ghost story you stumble onto) rely on the idea of "place" as the issue at hand far more than any specific ghost/ person or personality (even The Haunting, which gets kind of specific). At the end of the day, its our knowledge that we aren't supposed to be somewhere, and the sensation that the place is pushing back. I get it. I lived in Jester Dorm for a year, and in 1994 I would have gladly told you that building was alive and breathing and trying to kill me.
While there are a dozen ghost shows on TV of people trying to prove there are ghosts (and not doing a very good job of it), I guess the question movies like The Haunting, The Shining and Poltergeist try to answer are "so what are we exactly afraid the ghosts might do if we didn't leave the room? What do we think is going to happen?"
To this day, the scariest movie I've seen was the original The Haunting.
You can't see it, but you can hear it...
In that movie, the ghosts are most definitely the very angry spirits of a miserable, gothic-style family, and they are loud and they are really, really mad.
At least in The Shining, the ghosts are willing to give Jack a drink...
Hair of the dog that bit me, Lloyd
but then the ghosts get too into it and go and pull this sort of stuff...
Hey, we were having fun here, and you ruined it.
And its exactly that. I don't know what the heck ghosts are going to do.
By the way, yeah, The Shining was the creepiest movie I'd ever seen until The Haunting. Go figure.
I suspect the "oh, I thought maybe someone touched me in the dark" thing is pretty creepy, but its our imaginations that make this stuff really work. And when you have guys like Robert Wise and Kubrick trying to freak you out? Well, it kind of ups the ante on movies like The Mummy.
Hey! Steven G. Harms has popped up from the wilds of San Francisco with his own take on monsters. As always, Steven has given the topic some thought, and I think you'll enjoy.
My Least Favorite Monster
Growing up, I was not the kind of kid who easily scared from "monsters." As I reached late adolescence and began to seek out scary movies for thrills, I remember being a bit unnerved by Freddie, Jason, Chuckie, et al., but they never really kept me up at night.
"Monsters" in this "boogey man" sense weren't the thing that scared me.
What did scare me were ALIENS. Not the kind with nesting jaws that Sigourney could bitch-slap with an exoskeleton, but these seemingly peaceful faces and unclear motivations:
not Michael Jackson
The book that most directly delivered this adrenal shock was "Communion." The book's author, Whitley Strieber, tells a harrowing tale of being in his remote upstate cabin (creepy) in bed on a dark night (scarier) when he heard strange noises ("that's not a bobcat") until he saw the face of a non-human (i.e. alien) in his window!
AAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH
Aside: In a bit of quirk, Mr. Strieber refuses to call these entities "aliens" but rather prefers to denote that they are non-human and visitors. I suppose going to Streiber-con and calling the almond-eyed fellows aliens is like coming to my city of residence and calling it "'Frisco" or pronouncing that street in Austin something that is not like "Gwadaloop."
In case you don't know, "visitors" don't like hiking all the way out to our neck of the woods just to play peeping Tom to writers in cabins. Invariably they wanted to, as I recall it, communicate with Mr. Strieber and tell him about the vast world of the super-terran expanse: speak of its inhabitants, its threats (reptilian aliens), its opportunities (like Star Trek). As I recall (it's fuzzy after 22 years) there's some experimentation, some suspended animation, and some sexual manipulation (very frightening when you read this just past your decade birthday).
After reading this book I had several intense nights eyeing my window in suburban Houston. Despite the fact that it overlooked a sheer wall and was on the second story, I did not feel that spatial height or suburban sprawl were defenses against these visitors (although Win Butler of the Arcade Fire might disagree on that second point) and I had a few nervous nights pondering what I would do if I were trans-spatially peeped by these big-eyed voyeurs.
But in thinking of the Signal Watch's monster challenge, I'm intrigued by the fact that I didn't have a worst monster of the boogeyman variety. I think that's because my "monster" was nebulous in that he wasn't a proxy to a human ideal, system, or fear. Most monsters say something about the world in that they map to a world-view as a proxy. Dracula says "Beware the Hunnic bloodsman, he comes to seduce your proper (Victorian) ladies." As Lauren has reminded me often, the vampire is the polyglot, continental homme du charm, surely something to be feared. Frankenstein certainly stands in to our unnerved relationship to technology and "progress." In some way we recognize conventional "monsters" by the fact that they map to reasonable motivations that we ourselves recognize.
Communion is much more like a Lovecraft scenario: We're small, insignificant, and lucky something much larger doesn't come down an eat us. Heck, change "eat" to "drown" or "rip us apart by means of bear" and it's downright Biblical. I think this is what makes my "monster" so scary: it's a proxy to pure un-knowing, and that's very scary indeed. It doesn't map to a motivation we can readily grasp and if it were true there's nothing we could do about it.
If a vampire were on the loose, you could stake him; Frankenstein's monsters have a negative reaction to scalding oil, and even Justin Bieber will one day face the Damocles' sword of puberty. But what would we do about vastly more intelligent beings out there who can pop in as easily as a Ronco knife salesman? And what if they weren't, you know, groovy cats who wanted us to take up a vegan diet and join the commune of intelligent life?
This bifurcation was perfectly realized in the early seasons of "The X-Files." While the first season featured Boogeymen (The Jersey Devil, et al.) the addictive mythology arcs of the series focused on "others" with lack of intelligible animal motivation (e.g. black oil, the clones). Ultimately it was the questions of the realm of "pure unknowing" that carried the show through its 3rd and 4th years (and, uh, beyond, but I've blocked that out).
So, for these reasons, for being a portal to pure fear like Yog Sothoth himself, the Strieberian Grays are my least liked monster.
My Favorite Monster
As I said above, I'm not prone to being afraid of monsters. Consequently, it makes it hard to have a favorite monster. There's no evil scamp who can scare me like no other and I love (him/her) for that.
But I think I'm going to have to say it's Wolfman from "Monster Squad:" a movie I loved that I've heard tell is being re-made (more strip-mining of my childhood, hat tip Jamie Zawinski) and will, I'm sure, star Bieber and some Wil Smith-spawn. I like Wolfman not because he scared with impunity, but because of the impeccable comedic stylings that Carl Thibault expressed through him. Thibault made an "Ow my Balls!" moment work and make me laugh until I couldn't see straight.
Some members of the Corps will remember that I attended a screening of Monster Squad with JackBart this year. And, indeed, everything Steven says holds up.
Hey, ya'll! NTT has pitched in! He's got a lot to say, so let's get right to it.
Warning: This article contains massive spoilers in the descriptions for the works involved. If you see a title that you absolutely know you wish to watch or finish in the numbered headings, avert your eyes.
My Favorite Monsters (In descending order):
Putting together a list of my favorite monsters was a much harder task than I had originally presumed. It doesn’t help that I have through my life consumed a gigantic worth science fiction and fantasy, all of which are dripping with monstrosities from which to choose. I therefore culled my list down to those examples that expound or subvert my definitions of a monster. These are not the obvious choices but the ones that expanded my horizon of inhumanity to humanity. Or they’re just freaking cool. You decide after the list.
4). THE ANGELS from Neon Genesis Evangelion (TV Series, DVD and Movies)
Anyone who has watched Japanese anime knows that there is one series that has generated some of the most controversial arguments in Otaku culture and anime. This is that series.
Neon Genesis Evangelion is a work of supreme art and will be forever defined as the series that expanded anime’s reach to beyond entertainment and became an example of what can be achieved in the bounds of creative expression. It is a deconstruction of the “super-robot genre” or “mecha” of Japanese anime that subtly subverts the watcher over the course of the series from believing he is watching a rote action science fiction series to an intense examination of one’s place in humanity and the fragility of the human spirit. It’s complicated, obtuse, frustrating, subversive and then ultimately rewarding while shattering your expectations of genre fiction. Yes it is that good.
The ANGELS are gigantic, supremely powerful beings of cosmic origin that attack the Earth and humanity, notably Neo-Tokyo. Neon Genesis starts off like almost every other “super-robot” anime series where the Earth must be defended by a brooding adolescents that must pilot unique high technology robots of destructive power, the EVANGELIONS, against these beings and threats to the Earth.
Nobody move, I dropped a contact lens
The watcher is dripped subtle clues as to their existence and origin. Why are they called “Angels” and given code words like Sachiel and Ramiel, actual Biblical names? Why do the Angels manifest powers just like the EVANGELIONS piloted by the human defenders?
Eventually, it is revealed that the Angels are not working towards the Earth’s destruction but are trying to reunite and rescue Adam and Lilith, the cosmic beings held captive by NERVE, the organization that manufactured the EVANGELION robotic machinery. The conspiracy is that NERVE and other associated factions revealed in the series are using the biological contents of Adam and Lilith in a highly illegal and unethical attempt to change the course of human evolution and to subjugate humanity in their vision. And this is just at the end of the second arc of the series. AND then it just gets crazy.
Neon Genesis takes its inspiration from Judeo-Christian sources and frequently uses iconography and themes from Judaism, Christianity, Gnosticism and Kabbalism, in the series's examination of religious ideas and themes. The mysterious Angels force humanity to confront its origins and in turn reveal that it is humans that are maybe the monsters, not the Angels. 3) GLaDOS (Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System) from the videogame Portal
GLaDOS is a mysterious character in the 2007 video game Portal. She is an artificially intelligent computer system in charge of operating the Aperture Science research facility, which is the setting of Portal. She intially appears as a guide to the player in your attempt to escape the facility. Yet, as you progress through the game, GLaDOS increasingly becomes erratic, her voice modulates into something more malicious and she subtly attempts to force the player into actions that either place you in great danger or forces you to make choices that will unnerve your morality.
Equal parts HAL 2000 and the girl from the Bad Seed, GLaDOS is an imperfect creature, prone to temper tantrums, fits of jealousy, wanton destruction and manifests codependency to the player. She also is given to lying and cajoling the player into performing actions for her and then has a vindictive streak when you rebel.
I once had an angry Speak 'n Spell
Your final confrontation with GLaDOS in the game is a reflection of the entire rich game experience itself. She threatens you, tempts you like Satan, tries to bribe you and manifests clear insanity as she admits to ruthlessly killing all others in the facility before you. Oh and her morality module is missing so she’s a sociopath, awkward! GLaDOS then finally attempts to kill you all the while making jokes and justifying her actions in the name of “Science!” Playing the game and your interaction with GLaDOS is akin to playing the movie the Cube or is like being a mouse in a human maze. You are manipulated and taunted by a robotic, cunning entity that talks like mild mannered nurse with the soul of Hannibal Lecter. Your final confrontation with her is a meeting of powerful anger and vengeance. One of the best characters ever, GLaDOS is truly monstrous.
Priscilla is the main antagonist in the great anime series Claymore, whose main character Clare attempts to confront. The setting of the anime is that demons, termed as Yoma, exist with human beings and use humanity as their prey. Yoma have greater strength, speed, and durability compared to humans. The Claymores are created by the “Organization” to fight the Yoma and protect humanity. By implanting Yoma essence into humans, they are able to create a hybrid that is faster than the source Yoma with their original human combat training and intelligence. Clare, now a fully-trained Claymore and the protagonist, has a tragic and tortured history with Priscilla since her childhood that drives the narrative of the story to its mournful conclusion.
Priscilla is one of the most powerful of the Yoma; she behaves as almost a demi-god in the series utterly devoid of empathy and a whirlwind of violence. She is so self-absorbed in her alien mind that she simply doesn’t even know what her actions are doing personally to Clare and her world. Humanity is a speck in her eye as she wreaks tragedy wherever she steps.
Yes, I do have an enormous David Bowie collection. Why?
The end confrontation between Clare and Priscilla is steeped in nuance and suspense as each character takes her own haunted steps down their spiraling intertwined destiny.
1) GODZILLA, KING OF MONSTERS
RRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAARRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!
What can be said that has not been said? Godzilla is the best and ultimate monster. Q.E.D.
As a latch-key kid, I remember walking home every day from school and WFAA-TV in Dallas Fort Worth would show “monster week” specials in the afternoon matinee. Here, I was exposed the greatness that is Godzilla, Mecha-Godzilla and King Ghidorah. I was hooked. Godzilla was the god of destruction, equal parts a monster to humanity’s nuclear science hubris and the defender of the Earth. I always thought it was incredibly humorous that Godzilla gets to wreck Tokyo but if aliens tried to invade the Earth, by golly Godzilla wasn’t going to let that happen!!
Although he has been misinterpreted many times, the essence of Godzilla is as intriguing and cool as ever; he is a force of wrath, a metaphor for humanity’s global ambitions and sin, and the vengeance of nature. Most of all, he is the KING OF MONSTERS.
My Least Favorite Monster:
1) EDWARD CULLEN, from the series Twilight Saga
So simmeringly sexy...
Let me see…Bella is seventeen at the beginning of Twilight. Edward is at least one hundred years old, yet he stalks and seduces Bella, isolates her from her family and threatens her with violence. In the name of love. Nevermind the fact that his character is a borrowed amalgamation of Angel from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and White Wolf’s Vampire the Masquerade role-playing game. His creation and Twilight is a monstrosity.
I've known JAL a long, long time. I don't know exactly when we started hanging about, but I do remember he had a lot of pictures clipped from Fangoria in his locker in middle school. I can also say our first collaboration was a 9th grade video for English class wherein we discussed different kinds of horror movie characters. I have no idea what the assignment was supposed to be about, but I do know we called it "Psychobabble".
Anyway, dude knows his scary movies. He was the first one to show me Halloween (I could not believe Jamie Lee Curtis had played a high schooler. For some reason, that was mindboggling.). In college, we saw movies together like Dead Alive and Lynch flicks. So I am, of course, thrilled that he participated. The boy knows scary flicks.
Witches - I don't think it gets any scarier. I don't like them one bit, with their incantations and eyes of newt. I think what gets me the most is that the result of their ill deeds always seems to be very much linked to the visceral. Witches seem to revel in pain, be it vomiting cherry pits or finding cameraman's teeth in a bag. No one ever when quickly under the spell of a witch and what they're doing to you is seems to come from the darker corners of imagination.
Speaking of corners, they make you to things like this, which for my buck, is one of the most unnerving images committed to film.
AmyD is new to our Signal Corps, and I am delighted she's decided to participate, and I think you'll be glad, too
Least Favorite: Chucky
Why nobody ever just drop kicked this monster, I could never understand
As a fourth-grader, I had an irrational fear of Charles Lee “Chucky” Ray of the Child’s Play movie series fame. I couldn’t look at him, think about him, see him in a commercial, or hear other people talking about him without sensing indescribable dread and crying. Since he actually frightened me (and still does a little to this day), he is my least favorite monster. I have no idea where this fear came from because I have never even seen a single “Chucky” movie, and I had nothing but positive doll experiences growing up. It made no sense to anyone at the time. I couldn’t even go to the cheesy video store in my neighborhood, “Movies Galore” (yes, that really was the name), without dramatically avoiding the “Horror” movie section. If I even caught a glimpse of the demonic red-headed doll on the movie box by accident, my heart would race and I would start sweating profusely.
Unsurprisingly, my family had no idea how to deal with my strange behavior, but that fact has never stopped them from trying before. While my sister delighted in exploiting my fear, my parents decided to employ two different approaches to try to calm me down. My psychiatrist dad decided some sort of “thought experiment”/mental exercise was in order. He instructed me to lie down, close my eyes, visualize putting Chucky in a jar, twisting the lid on tightly, and putting the jar on a shelf somewhere in the recesses of my elementary school mind. I am not making this up. So, as I stretched out on the couch trying to put Chucky in a mental memory jar, all I could think was, "what if he gets out?" Cue panic.
My mother, the more practical of the two, took it upon herself to “tease” the fear out of my body. She was convinced that I was far too old and smart to be afraid of Chucky. Clearly, she did not understand that age and a high Brain Quest score were totally irrelevant to the matter. So, (again, I am not making any of this up) she would follow me into a room at night, turn off all the lights, and then whisper "Chucky, Chucky, Chucky" to me in the dark. Immediately the tears would well up in me and the guilt would set in in her. The tagline to all of these experiences as I would run out of the room was always the same, “Amy, I don’t even know what a ‘Chucky’ is. It’s just some pretend creature!”
I think these experiences only proved that my folks were well-meaning but ill-equipped to battle a little doll in overalls. Eventually, I outgrew my fear, was able to sleep again, and could rent as many Sega videogames from “Movies Galore” without any panic attacks. However, no one in my family has seen a “Chucky” film since he was banned from our household for so long. I doubt the ban and his “least favorite monster” moniker will ever be lifted.
Favorite: Rhoda Penmark from The Bad Seed (1956)
Wow. Just.. I need to see this movie.
Rhoda Penmark is the greatest mean girl there ever was. As both a child and a monster, this makes her all the more compelling. Children naturally don’t understand complex morality, and Rhoda flaunts this in the most grotesque manner. You really can’t help but empathize with her poor mother when she discovers her little brat killed grandma. My parents were big fans of “The Bad Seed,” so anything my sister and I ever did was dwarfed by Rhoda's growing body count. In fact, her evil nature worked to reaffirm our (mine, especially) own angelic goodness.
