Saturday, February 13, 2021

Watch Cattrall Party Watch: Split Second (1992)




Watched:  02/12/2021
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1990's
Director:  Tony Maylam


I picked this movie as a Watch Party because it looked like exactly what it was - a 1990's sci-fi Rated-R actioner that wasn't taking itself very seriously, but mostly because it co-starred Kim Cattrall, and after last week's Mannequin 2 viewing, I was like "we should have watched the one with Cattrall", so here we are.

Split Second (1992) is not a good movie.  A quick check after the film finished confirmed what I suspected - the movie had multiple voices seemingly at battle with one another, including star Rutger Hauer having input as they went along.  So, because the story is all over the place - and the story is basically them trying to figure out who (and then what) is killing people, nothing makes sense and nothing matters.

The answer is:  it's a big, Giger-Alien knock off that is maybe invisible, or moves very fast, or something.  They never really say.  I do know they hide the monster till the very end of the movie, but it's featured on the poster?  

We have an odd-ball pairing of the bookworm cop who has credentials that make him seem like maybe the police is a weird place for him to wind up, and Rutget Hauer, who is a loose cannon cop with self-destructive tendencies who clearly needs to be on leave, but they keep him on the streets because... well, in 2021 it'd be because the police unions will be damned before they suggest maybe someone isn't fit for duty.  Here we get a police sergeant just yelling at Hauer and telling him he's dangerous and whatnot, and then handing him back his badge.

Forget to Mention It Watch: Return of the Swamp Thing (1989)




Watched:  01/28/2021
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  Second?
Decade:  1980's
Director:  Does it matter?

We did this one as a watch party, and I often forget to write up watch party movies.  But, yeah, this movie isn't very good.

I...  I don't really think it bears much discussion.

Friday, February 12, 2021

Friday Watch Party: Split Second (1991)


Well, this looks like something I cannot believe I didn't see in 1991 when I was the exact audience for the movie.  But there you are.

It's the edgy future of 2008!  Rutger Hauer!  Kim Cattrall in a sassy brunette bob!  a monster!   A ridiculous gun!  Let's get 90's mid-budget actiony! 

Day: 02/12/2021
Time:  8:30 Central
Where:  Amazon Prime Watch Party

Link here to watch


Thursday, February 11, 2021

Happy Birthday, Max

 


Happy birthday to Max, one of Texas' finest exports.  

You can find him at:

  • https://twitter.com/FactoryMirror
  • https://twitter.com/ItsPlasticMan

Wednesday, February 10, 2021

Disney Watch: Treasure Island (1950)

 

Watched: 02/20/2021
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  unknown, but first in a while
Decade:  1950's
Director:   Byron Haskin

To give you guys an idea of the difference between kids movies of the early 1950's (that I watched about 30 years later) and what comes out these days - Walt Disney's Treasure Island (1950) features a guy ordering a "double rum" in the first scene, an old pirate drinks himself to death in the first ten minutes, and then there's cold-blooded murder, mutiny, and people shooting each other and a kid who shoots a guy in the face after getting stabbed with a dagger.

I mean, we saw this movie at school.  

I also checked the novel out of my elementary school library, and it makes the movie look like a walk in the park.  

Now THAT'S adventure!

It's a fascinating movie as Jim Hawkins, our 12-year-old avatar, is a kid caught up in a *very* adult adventure, complete with both the violence and risk of a pirate story, but - watching it as an adult - I'm reminded how flawed the protagonist-type characters are as well.  But, more than that, it walks a gray path for Jim as he is genuinely befriended, to the best of his ability, by Long John Silver - who clearly has a soft-spot for the kid, but will also cut his throat to save his own skin.  

This was one of the first movies I ever saw that included this sort of betrayal, and it was all the weirder to parse watching as a kid, because Jim and John do have a weird buddy-ship even though they're locked in mortal combat, and LJS's minions are *always* ready to gut the kid.  But I do like that Hawkins sees both sides of the coflict, and has complicated interactions with the adults around him.  It's a heck of a way to illustrate a young man discovering the world beyond his door.  



Tuesday, February 9, 2021

Finally Watched It Watch: The Last Picture Show (1971)


Watched:  02/09/2021
Format:  TCM on DVR (from, like, April)
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1970's
Director:  Peter Bogdanovich

So, I always knew this movie had a stellar reputation.  And, it's totally earned.  So earned, I'm not going to talk about it here.  Maybe on some future viewing.  

I *do* find the fact the father of a girl I dated in college was really, really pushing me to watch this movie to be a curious choice in making suggestions for the beau of your precious darling, but good on you, sir.  Good on you.

Mary Wilson Merges With The Infinite


Mary Wilson of The Supremes has passed.


Growing up, The Supremes were put on a pedestal by the media, and my mother herself was a fan.  While it was not non-stop Supremes music in our house, I was aware of her opinion on them.  And, even by middle school in the mid-80's, I was pretty well aware of their pop culture stature and place in American music.  

Just before COVID hit, SimonUK and I went to go see Mary Wilson at a small theater here in Austin.  Our seats were terrible, off to the side and partially obstructed by the piano.  Still, I was excited.  Hilariously, I'd found out days before that my parents were also going to be at the show, and sure enough - there they were.

Anyway - show starts, and Mary Wilson does a number, maybe two, then looks over at me and Simon and says "there's better seats right up front".  So.  We got up and moved, and I sat front row center for Mary Wilson, and I am here to report - it was one of the best concert experiences of my life.  

That was less than a year ago.  

I am stunned to learn of Wilson's passing.  She seemed a fraction of her 70+ years, was lovely, hit every note and kept the room in the palm of her hand.  I was semi keeping track of her for when I expected she would return.  

As shocked and saddened as I am to hear she has passed, I also am sure of her legacy and place in music history.  

We'll miss you, Mary Wilson.

Monday, February 8, 2021

Accidental Watch: Keep Your Powder Dry (1945)

the tagline is not remotely what this movie is about



Watched:  02/08/2021
Format:  TCM
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1940's
Director:  Edward Buzzell

Knowing it was Lana Turner's 100th birthday and TCM was running a marathon, I flipped over to TCM on the cable dial, and was just putting on this World War II movie about women in the WACs starring Turner, Laraine Day and Susan Peters... and then the movie ended and I realized I watched the whole thing.  

Anyway.  I guess that happened.  It was not bad!

Watch Party Watch: V.I. Warshawksi (1991)




Watched:  02/08/2021
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  First
Decade:  2020's
Director:  Jeff Kanew

When V.I. Warshaswki was advertised in 1991, I remember thinking "but... what is the hook?"  Like, I wasn't all that much into detective movies, and by 1991 already, the notion of a woman in an ostensibly male-oriented job wasn't... all that novel.  Especially when you had a big-ticket actor like Kathleen Turner showing up.  If she wanted to be a lady sous chef or neurosurgeon, okay.  

By hook I mean: I couldn't tell you much about the actual crimes or mysteries of the Lethal Weapon franchise, but I could talk about the cast and the character interactions.  I didn't pay money to see Mel Gibson solve a crime - I had detective and cop shows on every night of the week.  I paid money to see Mel Gibson and Danny Glover be pals and do their thing.  I hate to say it, but in 1991 and 2021, "but she's a lady!" is not much of a hook. Maybe in 1981?   

100 Years of Lana Turner




All I noticed was that - for reasons unknown - TCM was airing a full day of Lana Turner movies today.  They do this sort of thing, and I didn't give it a tremendous amount of thought other than - "gee, Lana Turner!".

It turns out today is the 100th birthday of screen legend Lana Turner.  

If you've never seen Turner in a movie and want to see what the hubbub is about, I'd check out The Postman Always Rings Twice.  

Turner was a thing of myth from her earliest career.  If you ever heard legends of actresses discovered at Schwab's Drug Store, that's Turner.*  She'd get dubbed "The Sweater Girl" for how she filled out her wardrobe.  Her personal life would take a few seasons of television to cover.  She was married nine times (starting with band leader Artie Shaw) and was probably most famous for her romance/ abuse situation with mob figure Johnny Stompanato that led to his death under confusing circumstances.    

But, as always, Turner rebounded.  I first saw her in the 1959 movie Imitation of Life (a thoughtful entry for a screening back in film school)  alongside fellow legend Juanita Moore.  If you've not seen it, fix that.  It's a terrific movie, a solid melodrama, and an examplar of the mid-century "women's picture" (and will give you a good idea what people are referring to when they reference Douglas Sirk).  

Like picking a Rita Hayworth film to watch, there's always the guilt of "why am I picking this movie?", but here's the deal - Turner was much more than her conisderable good looks.  Whatever was going on in her tragic and turbulent personal life (you can Google it), she's a natural actor and wouldn't have stayed on top for decade after decade if she didn't bring something special to her roles.  And she worked steadily from the late 30's to the mid-70's.  

I'm going to be watching Johnny Eager this week and might see if I can talk Jamie into Imitation of Life. But if you've not seen The Bad and the Beautiful, go for it.


*it wasn't actually Schwab's, but who are we or Turner to get in the way of a good story?

Sunday, February 7, 2021

PODCAST: "Singin' in the Rain" (1952) - A Signal Watch Canon episode w/ Jamie and Ryan


Watched:  02/06/2021
Format:  HBOmax
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1950's
Director:  Stanley Donen and Gene Kelly



Jamie and Ryan sing the praises of an American classic! It's pouring superlatives and compliments as we take a look at a movie that really speaks to you, even if it's not with its own voice. Join us as we talk through the technical achievements, phenomenal performances and great fun of an American classic!

Signal Watch Canon Playlist
Jamie's Cinema Classics

Lynda Carter Watch: Bobbie Jo and the Outlaw (1976)

they misspelled Lynda Carter's name.  Well done, person in 1976.



Watched:  02/07/2021
Format:  TCM on DVR
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1970's - and very much so
Director:  Mark L. Lester.  Go figure!

So, this came up on Prime, and I'd been meaning to watch it because it starred a pre-Wonder Woman Lynda Carter (reason enough), and then I found out it co-starred Marjoe Gortner, who you may remember from Starcrash.  And then the movie started and it said it was directed and produced by Mark L. Lester, and my brain about melted, because he's the guy who brought us one of my favorite movies: Commando.

Here's the thing - I wasn't expecting a ton out of this movie and was pretty sure I wouldn't finish it - but it was... okay?  Fine?  Nowhere the disaster I was expecting.  Like, it's a legit movie trying to do a thing, and it's competent, which I figured it would be when I saw Lester's name attached.  Which, honestly, was maybe a little disappointing, because I figured it was going to be terrible enough for a Friday night screening.  But, alas, it is not.  

Bobbie Jo and the Outlaw (1976) is part of the trend of movies that's -frankly - existed since the gangster pictures of the 1930's, but returned in force as stories of misfit individuals railing against normalized society (and winding up on the wrong side of the law).  The genre exploded with the counter culture adopting the idea with Cool Hand Luke and Bonnie and Clyde in 1967, and this movie borrows heavily from the latter film.

Bobbie Jo is a car-hop in New Mexico when she meets Lyle Wheeler, a smart but possibly crazy guy who idolizes Billy the Kid.  She's had it with her nagging mother and humdrum life, and decides Marjoe Gortner is her ticket out.  As one does.

The movie does a pretty good job of bringing the "crime spree" part up a bit later in the movie, letting Bobbie Jo and Lyle find their groove, do some peyote, and get up to basic shennanigans before it becomes clear Lyle stole the very cool muscle car their driving, and he's got no real jobby job.  They recruit Bobbie Jo's sister, her boyfriend and a nerdy pal and hit the road, eventually deciding to do some crimes - which Bobbie Jo is *delighted* about.  It's all fun and games.

There's a Buford T. Justice cop that goes in hot pursuit (which frankly makes no sense as he'd be leaving his jurisdiction, the FBI is nowhere to be seen, and he winds up accidentally killing a bunch of innocent people - which is never mentioned again).  

Anyway, the movie is predictable enough, because it wants to show that an outlaw like Lyle is too good or too much for this world, and Lynda Carter must survive in order to mourn him, gorgeously.  

It does feel a bit too reminsicent of Bonnie and Clyde at times, but I'm not entirely sure how you avoid the comparisons when it's two stories of outlaw lovers robbing places and trying to stay ahead of the law in the open spaces of the West.  You're gonna face some convergent evolution, even if you never saw Bonnie and Clyde.  

Watching the movie does make you wonder: wait, how was Lynda Carter *not* a bigger deal when she hit Hollywood?  Famously, she had less than $100 left when she was cast for Wonder Woman and otherwise wasn't finding any work.  This film was released in 76', and WW originally aired in 75', and I'm honestly not sure which shot first.    Wonder Woman premiered in late 75 and this movie came out in March of 76' and was an indie picture, so could have take a while to get assembled.  But before all that, her work is spotty.

Carter can sing, she can dance, she can act, and she - frankly - looks like Lynda Carter.  Maybe she didn't have the right mid-70's earthy qualities movies were looking for?  She's more old school in her approach than, say, Faye Dunaaway, but it sure *seems* like someone would have been smart enough to work with her.  Carter's part here is underwritten - she's mostly there to tell the audience that Lyle is sympathetic and not a sociopath (he is obviously a charistmatic sociopath, but I'm not sure the movie knows this, and thinks he's romantic).  But if you're more used to the polished Lynda Carter, it's a kick to see her getting high and playing with guns.  

Anyway - for a movie I was expecting to mostly suffer through, it was okay.  Maybe not the first thing I'd direct you to, but.  Anyway. 

Watch Party Regret Watch: Mannequin 2 - On the Move (1991)




Watched:  02/05/2021
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing: First
Decade:  1990's
Director:  Stewart Raffill

This movie wasn't very good.  Jenifer agrees.

These days, if a movie does well, studios understand that if they're going to make a sequel to a popular-ish film, the *best* thing to do is to try to go bigger and better.  Give the audience a reason to get them to come back.  However, Mannequin 2: On the Move (1991) is very much of the era where the reason for a sequel to exist was so that as many pilot fish left over from the first film can gorge themselves on the good will of the first movie and not care at all if the sequel will be worth the film it's printed on.

Pretty much nobody is back from the first movie - and I don't just mean Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall.  The actual producers, up and down, aren't the same.  The director is new.  You have the same store as the location, and you have Meshach Taylor back as "Hollywood".  That's it.  So no one cares, no one is trying, and the end product may be less than ideal.

Anyway, there MUST have been a script, because there are costumes and whatnot, so someone knew what they'd need for shooting.  But it sure doesn't feel like there's a script - it feels like people dicking around in front of the camera.  Except for Kristi Swanson, who is actually at least trying here (despite a bizarre wig that seems inspired by a Rick James groupie's hair).  And, yeah, Meshach Taylor, but he was kind of dicking around in the first movie, too.

But there's only small bits in the 90 minute run time that actually reach the level of "funny bit" or "joke that might make one crack a smile".  The rest is weird mugging no one asked for and maybe one of the lest charismatic leads I can remember in anything that wasn't one of those movies with people fighting in a sci-fi wasteland.  And the weird thing is:  normally that guy is fine.  He's been in lots of stuff - stuff you've seen.  But here - he's working with nothing, and I guess that was a problem.

I don't regret making other people watch the movie.  At least we all suffered together.