Saturday, May 2, 2020

Tweet-a-Long Watch: Battle Beyond the Stars (1980)



Watched:  05/01/2020
Format:  Amazon Streaming
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1980's
Director: Jimmy T. Murakami, Roger Corman

I dunno, man.  It's Battle Beyond the Stars (1980).  It's a not-great sci-fi movie that hasn't aged particularly well. 

Mostly I had fun watching it with a whole bunch of folks on the twitters!  Thanks for showing up, every buddy!

One day we'll understand why that ship has a rack/ looks like a diagram of the female reproductive system.

Noir Watch: Night and the City (1950)



Watched:  04/30/2020
Format:  TCM on DVR
Viewing:  2nd or 3rd
Decade:  1950
Director:  Jules Dassin

I've seen this movie before, and, if someone asked me what I think makes for a pure distillation of one of my definitions of "film noir", ie:  a character who is deeply in over their head because of a character flaw - you have Double Indemnity and you have Night and the City (1950).  And it's possible Night and the City is the even purer dose of the idea - because unlike Double Indemnity, there's no sex tangled up in the question - this is just a broken guy who, as Gene Tierney's character Mary says "You could have been anything. Anything. You had brains... ambition. You worked harder than any 10 men. But the wrong things. Always the wrong things..."

The only mistress in this movie, which absolutely does have the "good girl" in the form of Tierney waiting on our protagonist, is his own sense of destiny and overconfidence in his ability to play the grift. 

But, man, fate is a bitch.

Thursday, April 30, 2020

PODCAST: "The Killing" (1956) and "Asphalt Jungle" (1950) - Noir Watch! w/ JAL and Ryan



Watched:  04/03/2020 (Killing)/ 04/06/2020 (Asphalt)
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1950's
Directors:  Stanley Kubrick/ John Huston

More ways to listen

JAL and Ryan watch two noir classics. Both heists. Both starring Sterling Hayden. One directed by a young Stanley Kubrick, the other by John Huston. We dive into what makes them work, some terrific performances and which director was in his prime and which was sorting things out. It's a journey into movies that set the stage for every heist movie to come after.





Music:
Noir Watch Theme - The Unsuspected Main Theme - Franz Waxman
The Killing, Main and End Theme - Gerald Fried
The Asphalt Jungle Theme - Miklos Rosza


Noir Watch Playlist:


Live-Tweet on Friday Night (05/01) - "Battle Beyond the Stars"


On Friday night, join us for a live-tweet-a-long as we watch Battle Beyond the Stars, a movie I was led out of, totally freaked out, when I was five.

It is in no way scary.  I was a sensitive kid.


Watch at:  Amazon Streaming or other popular streaming sites
Day:  Friday, May 1st, 2020
Time:  8:30 PM Central
Hashtag:  #shiprack

We're going to start when I say GO on twitter.


Get queued up to about the 3 second mark on the movie.  Pause and wait on this image til you get the signal:

it is really hard to get a screengrab of an Amazon Prime video.  I am not spending time learning how to do it.  Your reflection may vary.

Then get ready to behold what happens when a small studios sees Star Wars, wants in on that money and decides "it's a western in space".  Then proceeds to rip-off a very specific, very famous western/ samurai movie.

But this movie has B-movie Queen Sybil Danning as a Space Valkyrie with the rad-as-hell mid-80's new-romantic band name of "St. Exmin".

I'm gonna fight on *her* team


Also stars George Peppard as the embodiment of my spirit, Robert Vaughn as Robert Vaughn In Space, John Fuckin' Saxon!, Sam Jaffe and the guy who played John Boy on The Waltons, Richard Thomas, officially killing his chances at making it to the big screen.  It also has a spaceship that, if memory serves, is trying to be both mother and lover to John Boy.

So, 8:30 PM Central time on Friday!  3 seconds in at that image above!


Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Today is Our 20th Wedding Anniversary: Satellite of Love



On this day, twenty solar cycles ago, I got up to a semi-empty apartment.  It was just me and the cat, who I did not get along with at this point, so we didn't interact much.

Jamie had spent the evening with her parents at a hotel in South Austin that no longer exists.  She would spend the day doing all the things I guess brides do on their special day.

Plus dialysis.  You know, we gotta stay on-brand.

Monday, April 27, 2020

In a Time of Virus: Sunlight and Bleach

No amount of parody or nihilistic social commentary could have prepared me for what it's actually like to see the virus that's taken over the United States.

On Thursday (04/23/20) the President of the United States, who has taken to a podium on a near daily basis for weeks - blathering at length/ incoherently, and showing genuine signs of mental decline (pick your poison as to why) - stood in front of a room of journalists and said scientists should look into shining UV lights or very bright lights on or into people to combat COVID-19.  He also said we should be looking at injecting people with disinfectants containing bleach, I believe.  That bleach clears the lungs right out.  Which, in a way, is true.  You'll certainly be beyond caring about your COVID-cough when you are dead because you've got 20 oz of Clorox filling your lungs.

Sunday, April 26, 2020

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla vs. SpaceGodzilla (1994)



Watched:  04/26/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1990's
Director:  Kensho Yamashita

Godzilla vs. SpaceGodzilla (1994) is maybe not the best entry in the series, but it does have a NASA official reviewing footage of the inside of a space craft that has some damage from an exterior source before exploding and says "it must have been a huge monster".  Look, science is just different in a world with Mothras and whatnot.

Friday, April 24, 2020

Ninja Dino Catholicism Drug Dealer Hooker Lawyer Doctor Watch: The Velocipastor (2018)


watched:  04/24/2020
Format:  Amazon Streaming Tweet-a-Long
Viewing:  First
Decade:  2010's
Director: Brendan Steere

It was amazing.

Thursday, April 23, 2020

Russell Watch: The French Line (1954)


Watched:  04/23/2020
Format:  TCM on DVR
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1950's
Director: Lloyd Bacon

Hoo-boy.  Apparently Howard Hughes realized, after loaning out Jane Russell to Fox for Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1952) and watching them make a mint, *he* had a Jane Russell under contract at RKO that he didn't need to loan out at all.  So, he decided to make another splashy musical about Jane Russell on a boat headed for Paris all on his own.  And if people liked a bit of sexiness, he was going to shove Jane Russell into even sexier outfits!  And he'sdrelease the movie in 3D!  Jane Russell would be dancing and standing around as if she were in the room!  You guys get it?  wink wink nod nod need I say more?

PODCAST: "Superman: The Movie" (1978) a Super Movie Special with Stuart and Ryan


Watched:  04/12/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  oh, you kidders
Decade:  1970's
Director: Richard Donner

Ryan is joined by fellow Superman super-fan, StuartW, as they take on the 1978 superhero film that made the world believe a man can fly. It's a discussion of how lightning was caught in a bottle and set a template that the better superhero films still emulate. It's a geek-out fan-fest as Stuart and Ryan fly high into the movie that maybe both of them have seen way, way too many times.

More ways to listen





Music: - All Songs from Superman: The Movie, OST, composed by John Williams



Ryan's Random Playlist