Kaiju Watch: Son of Godzilla (1967)

Watched:  07/08/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First (all the way through)
Decade:  1960's
Director: Jun Fukuda

Between you, me and the wall, I have been kind of dreading getting to these Godzilla films.  I'm not necessarily a fan of Minilla, but I understand his place.  Some of my first exposure to Godzilla was via the 1970's cartoon series which included "Godzooky", a character intended to appeal to the youths who was a doofus time sink taking away minutes from Godzilla fights.

We're only 13 years away from the amazing work of the original Gojira by this point, but as happens when kids glom onto a character, all the edges were knocked off (see: Mickey Mouse or Batman by 1940).  Godzilla is a big goof who people are afraid like maybe you'd fear a giant cow, and the introduction of "Baby Godzilla" in this context is mostly about giving kids an avatar to project what it'd be like to hang out with Godzilla and learn how to use your own atomic breath. 

I've never really been one for this line of thinking - I never wanted to be Robin if I could be Batman.  I suspect I at least kinda liked Godzooky as a kid.  A funny Godzilla was probably pushing the right buttons for me.  But there is nothing cute or particularly funny about Minilla.  In fact, he's kind of grotesque.

he looks like shirtless, toothless, old, fat man who can't find his slippers

It's just no way to run a monster island. 

Our story is that several scientists have come to a remote, supposedly empty island to work on a weather control experiment that will somehow assist with resolving world hunger.  This island is a popular napping spot for Godzilla.  It also contains mantises the size of a human.  The experiment goes kooky and radiates the island and the mantii grow to Godzilla sizes.  Minilla hatches from an egg and in his original form looks like a tadpole mated with a cow patty.  Its revolting and you kinda root for the mantises to make short work of the abomination. 

But Godzilla shows up and saves him. 

There's also a giant spider on the island (who is a dick).  And a fetching island girl who is the sole survivor of an archaeological expedition that went on way too long. 

This is also one the doofiest designs for Big G.  And I don't even know what they were thinking.

what if an alligator and avocado fell in love?

This movie is pretty clearly more or less aimed at the kiddies, and that's fine.  Jamie tells me it was straight to TV, which is wild.  But it does sort of have that budgetary look.  They forego multiple sets for just building pretty good mantises and a great looking spider muppet.  Why Minilla and Godzilla look like flaming garbage, I do not know.

Anyway - this is the era I've been bracing for as its "Godzilla, Friend to the Children" time, and I soon need to watch stuff like All Monsters Attack, which I have never successfully navigated. 

Stop Motion Watch: 7th Voyage of Sinbad (1958)

Watched: 07/07/2020
Format:  TCM on DVR
Viewing:  third
Decade:  1950's
Director:  Nathan Juran w/ special fx by Ray Harryhausen

These days The 7th Voyage of Sinbad (1958) is most famous for being part of the line of films with stop motion special FX by Ray Harryhausen, the great miniatures expert who is the direct line between King Kong and everything through Jurassic Park.

I dunno.  It's a lot of fun!  But - you know - in the unlikely event someone shrinks your beloved down to a 4" action figure size, I do not recommending putting her in a tiny box and then shoving it down your pants.  That's just weird, Sinbad.

Kaiju Watch: Godzila and Mothra - The Battle for Earth (1992)

Watched:  07/01/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First (somehow)
Decade:  1990's
Director: Takao Okawara

Do you like pointless Indiana Jones rip-offs?  Confusing plot twists that come out of nowhere?  Psychics?  and our friends, the Twins/ Fairies/ Cosmos?  Sad Japanese people talking about how we're all boned anyway, because we're destroying our own environment?  Disappearing mullets? Plot threads that begin, are very important, and left unresolved?  Most of all - do you like MOTHRA?

Well.

Godzilla and Mothra: The Battle for Earth (1992) is here to deliver the goods.

Tweetalong Watch: (Spawn of) Slithis (1978)

Watched:  06/26/2020
Format:  Amazon Streaming
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1970's
Director:  Stephen Traxler

Literally nothing happens for 97% of the movie.  I hated everyone in it but the woman named "Jeff".  Well, I also liked the monster. 

But it is a movie named not after a monster, but after radioactive mud.  Which.  Come on, guys.

Kaiju Watch: Invasion of Astro-Monster (1965)

Watched:  06/17/2020
Format:  Criterion BluRay
Viewing:  4th? - for whatever reason, I've seen this a few times
Decade:  1960's
Director:  Ishiro Honda

This one I've seen a few times and very much remember watching it as a kid on some local UHF channel.  However, I think watching it with Japanese language subtitled to English may have changed a few details.  I swear I thought this whole movie took place on Mars. 

It does not. 

Kaiju Watch: Ghidorah, The Three Headed Monster (1964)

Watched:  06/10/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  second or third
Decade:  1960's
Director:  Ishirō Honda


This movie is straight up nonsense and is, therefore, ideal.

January in Tokyo sees 82 degrees temperatures and an encephalitis epidemic.  People are all about UFO's.  A Princess is seeking asylum from her small country in Japan because (a) there is an assassination plot afoot before she can be coronated and (b) everyone is wearing Elizabethan collars and it is a fashion nightmare.  The Faeries are touring Japan and appearing on gameshows?

Anyway - we get way, way into the movie before there's even a hint of kaiju.  Instead, there's a plot about the princess jumping out of her plane before it explodes and then appearing in Tokyo possessed by a Venusian and predicting calamity (see: Ghidorah).  A reporter and her brother are stepping on each other's toes.  There's a hit squad of 4 very hep cats after the princess.

Kaiju Watch: Rebirth of Mothra/ Mothra Returns (1996)

Watched:  05/20/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1990's
Director:  Okihiro Yoneda

So, this movie was insane. 

Rebirth of Mothra/ Mothra Returns (1996) arrived with those kind of groovy Godzilla films where they were re-doing the earlier movies in a 90's context, and decided to expand the franchise with some Mothra solo flix.  It just happened to be directed by a second unit director who maybe wasn't quite ready for his own picture?

The first half has this weird vibe like an American kids movies of the late 80's - squabbling parents, a bratty younger sister maybe?  But then enter the Twins/ The Faeries from prior Mothra appearances.  And they HAVE NAMES.  (Mona and Lora.  Who figured?)  They also have a gothed out sister who went evil who rides around on a tiny dragon. 

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla - Tokyo SOS (2003)

Watched: 05/14/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  second or third
Decade:  2000's
Director: Masaaki Tezuka


This Godzilla film is a direct sequel, sort of, to Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla.  But in the tradition of Godzilla movies, the humans in the foreground are not the same as those in the prior film, minus a cameo and a return of the same Premier of Japan.

This one follows up, basically, with the rebuilding of Kiryu - the Mechagodzilla built by humans to protect Japan - smartly made from the bones and DNA of 1954 Godzilla.  The flight team from the prior film is shipped off for additional training and so we get a new flight crew.

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla v. Gigan (1972)

Watched:  05/12/2020
Format:  Criterion BluRay
Viewing:  First all the way through
Decade:  1970's
Director:  Jun Fukuda

We're in that part of the Showa era of Godzilla where it's kinda for kids and every once in a while there's a bunch of samurai blood shooting out of a kaiju.  Godzilla v Gigan (1972) features about 30 minutes of WWE-style monster fighting at the end of the movie, so it's light on plot and eager to deliver what you paid to see.

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla vs. Megalon (1973)

Watched:  05/08/2020
Format:  Criterion BluRay
Viewing:  First as an adult
Decade:  1970's
Director:  Jun Fukuda


This movie is straight nonsense.

That's not exactly a criticism, but it is remarkable how, in a short couple of decades, Godzilla went from "manifestation of faults and failures of a nation coming back in the form of an unstoppable behemoth" to "giant friend to the children who likes a good bit of wrasslin' with other giant monsters".  As I said elsewhere, any time you see one of these movies and it stars a kid in shorts and a long-sleeve shirt, you know you're often getting a particular flavor of Godzilla that is knowingly goofy.

Godzilla Against MechaGodzilla (2002)

Watched:  05/03/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  2000's
Director:  Masaaki Tezuka

This movie kind of kicked ass.

Sure, it's from the Millennium Series which is kind of confusing as the movies don't work in any shared continuity, but since we learn "all you need to know is Gojira from 1954", it's pretty dang easy to play catch-up.

Here's your plot:  1999, a series of monsters have been arriving in/ attacking Japan since Godzilla's first arrival in 1954.  A squad has been put together with advanced weaponry to take these monsters on, and has been pretty successful to date.  No more rampages like those of '54 (Toho also uses footage from Showa-era films as "documentary" footage).

But, whoops.  Here's a Godzilla again, with atomic breath and a terrible attitude about people.

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla vs. SpaceGodzilla (1994)

Watched:  04/26/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1990's
Director:  Kensho Yamashita

Godzilla vs. SpaceGodzilla (1994) is maybe not the best entry in the series, but it does have a NASA official reviewing footage of the inside of a space craft that has some damage from an exterior source before exploding and says "it must have been a huge monster".  Look, science is just different in a world with Mothras and whatnot.

Yes, This Is The First Time I Saw This: Tremors (1990)

Watched:  04/21/2020
Format:  Netflix
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1990
Director: Ron Underwood

No, I'd never seen Tremors (1990), and it's just one of those gaps that happened for no reason.  I always assumed it was exactly what it turned out to be, which is something I am not against and often enjoy if you catch me in the right mood.  And, hey, yes, it was exactly that movie.  And that's okay!

It fits neatly in with a lot of movies from the era, while also being generally better acted and produced with, frankly, amazing practical effects.  Good stuff and an entry-level horror I might show a kid.

I have nothing to add to anything about this movie except that I am joining my voice to the chorus that believes this is the prequel to Dune.  Fan theories!  Totally a legit way to watch movies!

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (1974) AND Terror of Mechagodzilla (1975)

Watched:  04/01/2020 and 04/03/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  Second?  First as an adult
Decade:  1970's

Frankly, on top of and due to Coronavirus happenings, work has been a bear, and - thus - in the evenings I've mostly just been looking for something *fun* when I peel myself out of my office chair and mosey down to the living room.   For some time, my Criterion Godzilla set has been calling to me from the bookshelf, so we finally broke into it a while back and started watching some Kaiju Kraziness.

Kaiju Watch: Godzilla vs Hedorah (1971)

Watched:  03/21/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1970's

I had never seen Godzilla vs. Hedorah (1971), and I remember asking Stuart about it about a year or two ago, and he sort of said "it's the psychedelic one" and sort of gave an amused shrug, so... I didn't really know what to expect. 

Kaiju Watch: Ebirah, Horror of the Deep (1966)

Watched:  03/20/2020
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1960's

Well, the poster is an amazing summary of this film, so I'll let it speak for itself.

PODCAST! "Teen Wolf" (1985) - w/ all-new co-contributor StuartW and, of course, me

Watched:  02/14/2019
Format:  Amazon Streaming
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1980's

From the great state of Missouri, StuartW joins us to talk about one of his favorites from the 1980's - and one you probably haven't seen in a long while - it's "Teen Wolf"! The movie that brought us Urban Surfin', a girl named "Boof" and a curiously blase attitude about a lycanthrope wandering the halls of a typical American high school.

There are three rules that I live by. 1) Never get less than twelve hours sleep 2) Never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city. And 3) never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.

-Coach Finstock, Teen Wolf, 1985

Music:
Big Bad Wolf - The Wolf Sisters, Teen Wolf OST
Win in the End - Mark Safan, Teen Wolf OST

Stuart's shirt:

PODCAST: "Kingdom of the Spiders" (1977) - SimonUK & Ryan talk tarantulas and Shatner!

Watched:  01/20/2019
Format:  DVD (Simon owns this?)
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1970s

It's a PodCast - Where else can I listen?

Oh my. Well, there's a lot of tarantulas, and that's a problem, see? But don't worry! Shatner is on the case! And while he's in a love triangle with his brother's widow and a sexy scientist, he's gotta help save the Harvest Festival because spiders are here. Drama! Thrills! Romance! Woody Strode! SimonUK! Ryan!





Music:
Things I Treasure - Dorsey Burnette
Peaceful Verde Valley - Dorsey Burnette
Green Side of the Mountain - Dorsey Burnette

The SimonUK Cinema Series:

Christmas Watch: Gremlins (1984)

Watched:  12/11/2019
Format:  Alamo Mueller Movie Party
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1980's

I saw Gremlins (1984) during its original theatrical run back when I was a kid.  I wasn't someone who watched any horror yet, so I do recall the movie scaring the crap out of me in one or two scenes, but as the same kid who thought Ewoks were *great*, I also loved me some Gizmo.

In fact, I started 4th grade with an official Gremlins backpack that had Gizmo screenprinted on the outside like I was Billy Peltzer chasing me down some Stripe with my little buddy.

Halloween Watch: Creepshow (1982)

Watched:  10/19/2019
Format:  Amazon Streaming
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1980's

No, I'd never seen Creepshow (1982), which, I guess, horror fans find to be a straight up problem.  So, I went ahead and put it on this last weekend while Jamie flew to California to see The Dug.

I like a horror anthology film!  If you're not into what's going on, you just wait til the next segment.  And, honestly, a lot of what folks try to build up as tension in horror but dragging things out in (poorer) horror, I just wish they'd get on with it - so short stories are a great way to go.

Turns out I'd seen all of one segment at some point back in the day on cable (the chapter with Ted Danson and Leslie Nielsen), and parts one or more others.  But I don't think I knew that was + when I watched it back around 1989.

I got not much to say.  It was fun.  I liked the part with the crate monster best, I think.  But it's a highly quotable movie that I'm not sure gets quoted. ("I want my cake!" should be a horror catch phrase.  Is it one?  Is it T-shirt slogan worthy?)

Anyhoo... some terrific make-up effects and some good practical and puppet FX, too.