NEW YEAR WATCH PARTY - "Johnny Mnemonic" - because it takes place in 2021

 

Day:  01/01/2021

Time:  8:30 Central - Texas time, yo

Link here for the shoooooowwww

So, I last saw this in the theater opening day, 11:30 AM show.  And it was very bad.  So bad, I had forgotten it co-stars Dina Meyer's terrific jawline.

she has great hair, too

Anyway - let's see what the citizens of the early 90's thought this year would look like!  

I've watched the first five minutes, and... uh, maybe they weren't so far off, is what I'm saying.

Only, far less Dina Meyer than we could have hoped for.

Watch Party Watch: Guest in the House (1944)

Watched:  12/29/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  First

Decade:  1940's

Director:  this one is confusing, but it's listed as follows on IMDB -  John Brahm, John Cromwell...(uncredited) André De Toth...(uncredited) Lewis Milestone...(uncredited)

A dopey young doctor has fallen for his patient - a mental patient with a phobia of birds and a love of stirring shit (Anne Baxter).  Reasonably, he takes her to meet his idiotic family (minus one key player).  Unreasonably, he just f'ing leaves her with his idiotic family who just met her.  She gaslights the living shit out of everyone, including an 8 year old girl.

This movie features:

• 3 great 1940's hairstyles on lovely women
• 1 coocoo bananas psycho
• Multiple dum-dums who clearly never met a Mean Girl
• 1 Margaret Hamilton reminding you why it was hard for her to find work after Wizard of Oz seared her into your mind as a broom-riding funster
• 1 wife who is wildly tolerant of 1 husband who is clearly banging his model no matter what the script tries to tell us
• 1 man who has all the appeal of a soaked Ralph Bellamy that is, because filmed during wartime, the only man around sold to us as a real dream boat
• 1 bird pining for the fjords

It is not a BAD movie, but it is also not hard to imagine how this movie could be better.  Also - how this sort of movie became a Lifetime movie, which would be called "Psycho Sister-In-Law".

However, this movie ALSO was released under the name "Satan in Skirts", which...  *chef's kiss*.

Friday Watch Party: (this one will cost you $2) "Lady in the Lake" from 1947

We figured out that if you rent it, we can all Watch Party it.  

This one WILL cost you $2 to participate.  I get none of the money.  

Day:  Friday - 12/17

Time:  8:30 PM Central

JOIN US

For this week's selection, I'm pulling out part of my personal Christmas canon - "Lady in the Lake".  

• It's one of very few movies shot entirely from a single character's POV - essentially a videogame perspective, and done in 1947 with those giant cameras
• Based on the novel by Raymond Chandler
• Starring Signal Watch patron saint: Audrey Totter
• It takes place on Christmas

What's not to like?

Watch Party Watch: Blood Beat (1983)

 

Watched:  12/11/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  First

Decade:  1980's

Director: Fabrice-Ange Zaphiratos

Sometimes you watch a movie that is so off the rails, the batshit-ness gains its own power.  

I *think* I basically get what occurred during Bloodbeat (aka: Blood Beat) (1983), but I am willing to hear any interpretation of events which unfold in the film.  

A woman living in rural Wisconsin welcomes home her kids from college for Christmas.  Her son has brought his girlfriend, unannounced.  NBD, but the mom is also on the skids with her rednecky live-in boyfriend, and she's a painter and psychic.  Sort of.  And she gets a weird vibe from the girlfriend.  

The girlfriend also hits a psychic tripwire upon arriving, so... They all go hunting.  The girlfriend does not like.

A samurai ghost shows up when the girlfriend is sexually aroused.  And the sister seems unable to get an outfit together that makes any sense.

Anyway - the samurai ghost kills the neighbors who try to put too many things on a waterbed.  

There's a psychic battle, stock footage of nuclear blasts, and some light nudity.  It all feels like a one off issue of X-Men circa 1984.

I genuinely enjoyed this thing.  DIdn't know where it was going from moment to moment, and was both just confusing and concrete enough to stick with for the 90 minute runtime.  Not a technical marvel, but it had a certain je ne sais quoi.

Merry Christmas.

Friday Watch Party for 12/11/2020 - "Blood Beat" - I swear it's a Christmas movie

 

• Day:  12/11/2020
• Time:  8:30 Central

HERE'S THE LINK

I swear this is a Christmas film.

I got nothing else to say.

Christmas Watch Party Watch: Christmas Twister/ F6 Twister (2012)

watched:  12/4/2020

format:  Amazon Watch Party

viewing:  first

decade: 2010's

director:  Peter Sullivan

Woof.

This is the most insanely lazy movie I've seen in a while.  Like, it's one of those where you're watching and thinking "literally nothing in this movie is how that thing works".  Not how tornadoes work, meteorology, news reporting, children, school, architecture, accents, clouds, pregnancy, smoke, basements, emergency situations, college, glasses or Ft. Worth.  Or, in fact, Christmas.  

Like - why?  How did this script get written?  Was it by someone amazingly dumb?  Were they kidding and no jokes landed?  I just don't get it.  I am not an expert in ANY of the topics above, but I do live on earth, and I have a sense of memory of events and observations.

I really can't spend energy on this.  They didn't.  

But I did like Deb, the news producer.  

Friday Watch Party: Christmas Twister/ F6 Twister

 

Well, apparently this WAS called "F6 Twister".  now it is CHRISTMAS TWISTER.

Looks Christmassy!  And it takes place in Texas, which I am sure will be depicted accurately and with respect.  And they're starting well, because that is not any recognizable Texas town in the poster.

• Day:  12/4/2020
• Time:  8:30 PM Texas Twister Time

Link here, y'all

Watch Party Watch: Day of the Triffids

Watched:  09/18/2020
Format:  Amazon Streaming
Viewing:  First
Decade:  1963
Director:  Steve Sekely, Freddie Francis

I forgot to write this up in September, and now it's too late.

Friday Amazon Watch Party: Working Girl

 

Day:  11/27/2020

Time:  8:30 Central

Link for viewing

My memory of this movie is that it's about a highly competent Sigourney Weaver who gets into an accident and her secretary schemes against her in her absence.  It's a tragedy of sorts.  Melanie Griffith, the secretary, even manages to woo away her supervisor's love interest, Harrison Ford.  

Anyway - we're watching it.  FRIDAY.

Watch Party Watch: Masters of the Universe (1987)

Watched: 11/20/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  Unknown

Decade:  1980's

Director:  Gary Goddard

I should start by saying:  I didn't ever really like He-Man and the Masters of the Universe as toyline, cartoon, what-have-you.  Maybe because a lot of the material behind the franchise is simply bad.  The Filmation cartoon was goofily animated and the voice actors always sounded like they were recording out of context and in a well-tiled bathroom.  It featured a handful of wildly annoying characters and artists who really wanted to work in a few rotoscoped shots as often as possible.  (I will say - it DID blend American comic book style art very well, and should have shown Marvel how to do this instead of what they did in the 1990's.)  But mostly, He-Man was a lot of nonsense to sell toys, and that's great.  I support that idea.  I just wasn't into their particular gumbo of elements that made up their cartoon and toys (and found the original line of toys frankly grotesque, and not in a fun way).

Friday Watch Party: Masters of the Universe (1987)

Day:  Friday 11/20/2020

Time:  8:30 PM Central

Link For Viewing

So, this movie kinda took down Cannon Films.  It's an adaptation of a popular toy line and cartoon, and decided to appeal to no one by changing the location, characters and looks of the characters.  But it does feature an early appearance of Courtney Cox and a "is this stardom?" era Dolph Lundgren, and a Frank Langella having the time of his life.

The movie is garbage, but it does have Meg Foster as evil enchantress/ excellent-eyes-haver Evil Lyn.  And that ain't all bad.

Next week - if it's still on Prime - we're doing Working Girl.  I'll be rooting for Sigourney Weaver.

 

Interaction Watch: For a Few Dollars More (1965)

Watched: 11/10/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  Unknown.  Probably fourth or fifth

Decade:  1960's

Director:  Sergio Leone

It had been maybe 15 years since I last watched For a Few Dollars More (1965), the second in the Man With No Name trilogy, which catapulted Clint Eastwood to stardom, made Leone an unlikely star director, and gave me some movies to be blown away by in my last teens/ early 20's.  

It's an interesting bridge between the solo adventure of a Fistful of Dollars, which is also maybe a bit rougher from a technical standpoint, and the groundbreaking filmmaking that would come with The Good, The Bad and The Ugly and explode into masterpiece filmmaking with Once Upon a Time in the West.  

I may like Leone's work.  Sue me.

The film isn't *that* different to characters and bears from A Fistful of Dollars, but it does insert Lee Van Cleef as the variable in the experiment, and to great effect.  It's not hard to track how Leone went from this film to the three character structure of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly in the next film, giving chances for shifting alliances based on the character's self interests and motivations.  Flashbacks in this film presage similar from the finale from OUATITW.  

It's a gorgeous film, and the pacing and characters are happily breaking the conventions of Westerns of the prior 60 years of film, pointing the way for what we would come to expect from an American action film.  To the point that, with no knowledge of film history, what people coming to this movie for the first time would even think.  But this is 1965 - we're barely two steps from Hopalong Cassidy, chronologically.  

If you think you don't like westerns (a statement I think just basically means: I don't like movies about people without cars, as "western" is a nonsense category of a movie), give the Man With No Name Trilogy a shot.  It's amazing stuff.  

Interaction watch - RoboCop (1987)

Watched:  11/03/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  let's not talk about it

Decade:  1980's

Director:  Paul Verhoeven

I think we'll be podcasting this at some point in 2021, so we're gonna take a pass on writing it up.

But it was fun to watch as a Prime Party, as some hadn't seen it or hadn't seen it in a while.

Watch Party Watch: The Taking of Pelham 1-2-3 (1974)

Watched:  11/13/2020

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  third

Decade:  1970's (and sooooo 1970's)

Director:  Joseph Sargent

I saw this one the first time at the Paramount with absolutely zero context.  Back in the day, I'd just show up for whatever was showing during the Summer classics series, and it's how I first saw some of my "new favorite" films since college.  Third Man.  Sunset Boulevard.  and a host of others.  

And, yeah, I really like The Taking of Pelham 1-2-3 (1974).  It's a tidy caper movie, sharing screen time between the heisters and the heisted, but with no set up - just the execution.  So, when four guys take a subway car hostage on a weekday afternoon in New York, it makes no sense to the guys running the subway - blue collar schlubs whose jobs it is to literally make the trains run on time - and it takes a minute they don't have to figure out what the hell is going on.  Let alone - how the baddies think they're going to get away with it (they're trapped in a tunnel, too).  

The gang is a classic heist gang.  The master mind.  The wild card.  The dutiful sergeant.  The guy who is there as the inside man.  But part of what makes the movie is that the guys on the other side of the mic aren't hostage negotiators - they're public employees suddenly in a very weird position, running communications from the heisters all the way to the Mayor.  And, of course, they're a bunch of 1970's New Yorkers.  

As the world I live in is project and operational management, I get a kick out of heist films.   The heist = a project - and the plan for the heist, accounting for everything that can occur and keeping your stakeholders managed sure feels familiar.    The opposite side is operations, which are interrupted by the interference of the heist.  And - man, as I am wont to say - people are terrible in a crisis.

One detail I like about the film is that no one is working in synch on the MTA or government side.  From the mayor dithering and worrying about votes to the internal disagreement in the subway tracking office where Matthau is trying to keep things in hand.  I assure you, there's almost always someone in a crisis who is more bent out of shape that they can't do their usual job than aware of the actual unfolding situation than makes rational sense.

The movie was released in '74, so the occupants of the jobs likely have been sitting in that office since the late 1950's.  There's a casual racism and sexism pervading the scene and characters, and the film does comment on it - albeit not in the way we're used to in 2020.  Brace yourself for some stereotypes (especially among the hostages) and among the main cast.  It's a movie about an imperfect world that has to suddenly deal with the unknown.  

It's a tight film - the run time almost occurs in about half of real-time.  We don't worry too much about the home lives of the characters, and we don't even really know the motivations or what led up to the heist.  But what we do get is a wild mix of talent in the film which makes it work.  Walter Matthau, Robert Shaw, Jerry Stiller, Martin Balsam, Hector Elizondo, Doris Roberts, Julius Harris, Kenneth McMillan, and a bunch of other faces you'll recognize (I finally identified Robert Weil as also appearing in Hudsucker Proxy after it's bugged me every time I've watched this movie previously).   

Anyway, worth your time some time.

Friday Watch Party: The Taking of Pelham 1-2-3

Day:  Friday - 11/13/2020

Time:  8:30 Central

Link is HERE

An outstanding cast!  New York in the 1970's!  Subways!

Personally, I think this is a heck of a movie, so we're not throwing something goofy at you.  

Amazon Watch Party Watch: Escape From New York (1981)

 

Watched:  11/06/2020
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1980's
Director:  John Carpenter

I'm not writing this up.  If you've not seen it, you're all the poorer for it - but it's a fine bit of early 80's cinema.  And, of course, established Kurt Russell as a non-Disney star.

FRIDAY WATCH PARTY: Escape From New York

 

Sooooooo...  I had two weeks worth of plans, maybe three, for our Friday viewings.  But someone pulled their catalog off of Amazon Prime as near as I can tell.  So, no Pump Up the Volume or Short Circuit for us.  I'm in a bit of a panic, so I'm reaching for a personal favorite since it was pointed out it was on here by Jenifer.  

• Day:  11/06/2020
• Time:  8:30 Central
• Where:  Amazon Prime Watch Party

LINK HERE, Y'ALL

It's a post-apocalyptic future of 1997, and America is perpetually at war.  New York has been turned into one big penal colony, and Air Force 1 just went down nearby.  The President's escape pod has fallen into the middle of NYC, containing the President and a recording which will bring an end to conflict. 

The Feds happen to have just laid their hands on one of the toughest criminals to ever walk on American soil:  Kurt Russell with an eyepatch.

Now, Kurt Russell with an eyepatch needs to enter NYC, retrieve the package, and make it back out before the bomb in his neck explodes.  And he's gonna need Harry Dean Stanton and Adrienne Barbeau (which I think we can all say).  

Written by John Carpenter! Directed by Carpenter!  Music by Carpenter!  

Watch Party Watch: House on Haunted Hill (1959)

Watched:  10/30/2020
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  Unknown
Decade:  1950's
Director:  William Castle

We were trying to find an ideal movie to prep friends for Halloween, and I think a William Castle spooktacular starring Vincent Price is a pretty good option.  

House on Haunted Hill (1959) is a classic in part because it's an examplar of Castle's interactive theatrical experiences (I believe during this movie, he released a skeleton over the audience on wires) and because it seems to be in the public domain.  But, I dunno, I kind of like it.  It's cheesy, it's giddily malicious, and it makes no sense unless you say "I guess maybe the house WAS haunted?"

Anyway - it's not high art, and doesn't have quite enough spooky scenes, but it's still a fun one.

Interactive Watch: The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake (1959)

 

Watched:  10/27/2020
Format:  Amazon Watch Party
Viewing:  First

Decade:  1950's
Director:  Edward L. Cahn

I had never heard of The Four Skulls of Jonathan Drake (1959) before this week.  But it was Jenifer's selection for the Tuesday watch-along party, Halloween appropriate, and had a wacky premise.  And that premise was: what if someone read an article on head-shrinking in National Geographic?  

A family somewhere in America full of the last vestiges of Victorian gentlemen scientists/ explorers had once gone to South America, gotten killed and brought a curse down upon the Drake family.  Now, the brother of Jonathan Drake has been murdered/ decapitated, and a skull has mysteriously appeared in the family crypt.  

But a lot of heads have gone missing in the Drake family over the years, and skulls keep appearing in a handy skull-accommodating curio cabinet they've got.  

Well, turns out there's an evil scientist who seems to have it in for the Drakes (the last of which is a young woman with a solid profile), and there's a spooky guy dressed in some sort of clearly supposed to be "native" garb that looks like a track suit who has his lips sewn shut running around poking people with a stick dipped in poison, which is a real dick move.  

A cop gets involved and is cranky, but decides magic makes as much sense as anything else.

Look, these days it's hard to do a story where "evil" is based on anything coming from a place other than WASP-based culture without getting the twitter cops on you.  I get it - this movie is xenophobic at minimum, exploitative at best, and has the weirdest opposite of "brown face" you're gonna see in a movie.  I do think that it's okay to have *some* aspect of mystery out there in the world and that it's possibly not a reason to go into hysterics re: the movie's racism.  This is not the movies to champion that idea, but it's possible.

As a straight horror movie, it actually has a nice, pulpy set-up, and I can see this in a horror comic or the like, as much as on the screen.  It sticks to *some* tropes, like the big, strong American cop plowing ahead through the film's action, but it also has so much to set up with the premise, it still has a bit of novelty.  Mostly, it really, really leans into using a few key real-world terms and indigenous words and no one sounds natural using them.

Much discussion was had about the stiff acting of Valerie French in this film, but I think (a) she wasn't given much to do and this was probably shot in a week, and (b) she's doing something approximating an American accent over her London accent, and it's clearly a struggle.  She might have been happier in a Hammer Horror during this window.

Friday Amazon Watch Party: House on Haunted Hill

Day:  October 30th, 2020

Time:  8:30 Central

LINK HERE!  Come watch and chat!

One part Vincent Price, one part William Castle, and a dash of Elisha Cook Jr.!  It's a house!  It's on a hill!  And maybe, just maybe, it's HAUNTED.  

A favorite of MST3K, Elvira, and inexpensive UHF Halloween-time programming, Vincent Price is caught in a bad romance with a cranky blonde.  For her birthday, he's rented a house with a reputation as a site of murder and, more recently, GHOSTS.  Like, angry ghosts!  

Price has invited several strangers, each in need of some quick cash.  If they can survive the night, they get a sack of dough.

As a welcome gift, each of the guests receive a gun.

Anyway - it's a kooky, campy good time, with Price being all dapper in a well-cut suit.  There's some good jump scares, crazy ideas and Elisha Cook freaking the @#$% out.  Skeletons.  Old ladies making faces.

It's a whole scene.