Wednesday, December 23, 2020

Hallmark Watch: Christmas at Dollywood (2019)

Dolly's outfit needs more sequins

Watched:  12/18/2020
Format:  Hallmark Channel on DVR
Viewing:  First
Decade:  2010's
Director:  Michael Robison

Arguably, no one involved with this movie knows how anything works in real life and everyone but Danica McKellar's character should be fired.  And Dolly, of course, should always be held blameless.

We've watched a lot of parts of Hallmark movies this year, but watched almost none from start to finish - but when a movie promises to serve up Dolly in prime, post 2000 incarnation of Dolly as glamorous wise songstress and embodiment of goodness - I'm in.  I have, in fact, watched a good chunk of "The Coat of Many Colors" movie and everything.

Here, Danica McKellar plays a widowed party planner and failed children's book writer.  She is, as it turns out - a kick-ass events coordinator (which is very much a real thing - and one of those Hallmark movie jobs that seem like ANYONE could do it if they wanted to, and so feels in-reach to the core audience of basic Karens.  But, like writing children's books, is, in fact , hard.).  Apparently her character is from Pigeon Forge, Tennessee and grew up in the shadow of Dollywood - and a childhood friend and current employee of the park asks her to come down and save the Dollywood 30th Anniversary Christmas Party.  

And here's approximately where stuff goes off the rails.  

Our male lead is a high level park coordinator, but not the actual General Manager or whatever he's vying for - but he's doing all the things of that job, because ain't noboy ELSE doing those things.  But I'm thinking he - or someone else at Dollywood - is a mess, because the reason Danica McKellar is summoned down is that the company that was supposed to do it QUIT.  With, like, a week before the event.  So - Not the General Manager is trying to pull this off, as well as his regular duties.  But they also ask McKellar - who has flown down for this job - to interview.  With a week before an event requiring massive levels of coordination.  

  1. The party is both simultaneously not being prepared for and being prepared for
  2. Dollywood is INTERVIEWING candidates for a replacement
  3. There is a WEEK before the party is going to happen
  4. No one thought to ask Dolly herself to participate until McKellar shows up
The Not-General Manager then proceeds to neg Danica McKellar for having "ideas" for 2/3rds of the movie, and she eventually - of course - falls in love with him because: man in movie.  Look: Danica McKellar is simply TOO GOOD for the lead dude in this movie and she is SETTLING.  And Dolly really needs to take a hard look at the staff at the park - because none of this makes any sense and should have been a disaster if not for the quick wit of Danica McKellar.

Overall - this is a fine advertisement for Dollywood, which was the intention of the movie, so... hat's off.

But Dolly looks fabulous and is full of wisdom, so it's a good movie.  But, frankly, not enough Dolly music in the movie.  Needed at least two more songs.

No comments: